Being a parent is a tough job even with well-behaved kids. Kids naturally go through ups and downs at all ages, and sometimes it’s tough to manage. Things get harder when kids reach their teenage years and that’s when you’ve got less control over who they hang out with and what they do. For many teens, the stress of school and the crazy rollercoaster of puberty hits them hard and they start using drugs and alcohol to numb the pain.
To make matters worse, if a teenager is pregnant, substance abuse can have dire consequences for the baby. Heavy alcohol consumption can cut off oxygen to the fetus’ brain, which can result in fetal alcohol syndrome.
“Depleted oxygen levels also play a factor in the development of cerebral palsy as the areas of the brain affected are responsible for the development of common motor functions, balance and the ability to speak.” Rosenfeld Injury Lawyers note. Teens don’t understand the full extent of potential consequences – a child with cerebral palsy might require a lifetime of care that they may not be able to handle.
School anti-drug programs don’t work for all kids
Although most schools have anti-drug programs that teach kids about the dangers of alcohol, hard drugs, and tobacco, it doesn’t seem to be working for the majority of students. The CDC reports that by 12th grade, two-thirds of students have tried alcohol, half of high schoolers have used marijuana, and nearly half of high school students have tried cigarettes.
If school drug education programs aren’t successfully preventing experimentation that can turn into addiction and abuse, is it even possible to prevent? Can parents be more effective than school programs?
Parents might be able to prevent substance abuse more effectively than schools
With the right approach, parents have a unique opportunity to reach their kids concerning drug and alcohol abuse. When kids aren’t in a school setting where they want to look cool all the time, they can be more willing to listen provided they’re approached in a non-threatening manner.
Another factor to consider is that peer pressure is real, and sometimes kids get trapped in situations they don’t know how to get out of. In those situations, many give in to trying substances they would otherwise avoid.
Parents may not realize how easy it is for their kids to end up in situations that make them uncomfortable and they’ll stick around because they have no way out. Feeling trapped, they participate in whatever the group is doing even when they don’t want to. That’s exactly what author Bert Fulks discovers every time he speaks to youth in substance recovery programs.
Fulks is the creator of the X-Plan concept and author of X-Plan Parenting, a book that helps parents create a plan to get their kids out of those uncomfortable situations without their friends knowing what’s going on. He calls it the “X-Plan” because the plan is put into action when the child sends a text message to their parent with the letter “X.” The parent will then call their kid and tell them something is wrong and they need to come home immediately and they’ll explain later. The other part of the plan is that the parent promises not to lay into their kid for asking for help. This aspect creates trust between the parent and child; a child is unlikely to ask for help without that trust.
When kids have a way out of uncomfortable situations, they’re less likely to give in to peer pressure when they don’t actually want to experiment with drugs or alcohol.
Effectively communicating the consequences of substance abuse
For some kids, looking cool and maintaining a reputation as a defiant rebel is more important than anything. The consequences of substance abuse seem too far off to matter. They think it doesn’t apply to their life. They’re not going to get lung cancer by smoking a couple of cigarettes here and there, and they think only other people who die from drug overdoses.
The truth is, teens don’t always understand the consequences because the consequences are presented as a threat rather than a reality. For example, yelling at your child that they’ll end up dead or on the street if they keep using drugs doesn’t effectively communicate the consequences. On the other hand, you’ll have a better chance by sitting down with them and explaining the consequences in a manner that shows your deep concern and love for their wellbeing.
While schools will always have their drug-free programs, parents can’t rely on those programs alone. If you’re worried about your teenager, get the X-Plan Parenting book and learn how to be an ally for your child. Their life might depend on it.