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You’ve Been Part of a Long-Term Relationship for So Long. Now What?

Being part of a loving, caring and exciting relationship is wonderful and desirable to anyone, regardless of gender. What happens, however, when you’ve been in one for some time and these feelings have started to fade? Getting panicked and defensive certainly won’t help to rekindle the romance.

There are though some core guidelines to follow if you feel you’ve reached this point in the relationship:

1. Nurture Emotional Intimacy

Over time, couples tend to drift apart, letting their communication grow thin and with it, closeness and emotional intimacy. Your needs may also have changed in time, so you need to respectfully and lovingly communicate them to your partner. Do not underestimate what putting a positive spin on things can have on your relationship. To this end, try to focus on being empathic and supportive, rather than highlighting what is not working out between you. These issues have probably been hovering over your relationship in the past time, so the last thing you want to do is point to them constantly.

2. Bring Back the Sexual Spark

It’s safe to say that whatever strains the relationship may be facing, there’s a great chance that your sexual chemistry may face them too. There are a number of reasons why attraction fades with time and getting it back on tracks is definitely not easy. You can always try switching the pattern of initiation in the bedroom, in order to break the spell of any power struggles between you. It’s also advisable that you openly and lovingly talk about your fantasies – you may find out that he has daydreams regarding cheerleader costumes or nurse costumes, but is too shy to mention them. Whatever it is, as long as you go for an approach that fosters openness and care, you might just see some visible results.

3. Meet Them Halfway While Working on a Project Together

It’s true that long-term couples need to step back a bit from each other and schedule activities that they can be part of by themselves, in order to grow and develop as people. That does not contravene the fact that taking on a more ambitious project together can also work wonders for both of you. The accomplishments you will tick off your list as part of this project will come with an increase of oxytocin, creating that amazing sense of feeling connected to each other. It can either be a project around the house, a professional project where you can both bring in your unique set of skills or a project that involves giving back to other people.

4. Support and Encourage Them No Matter What

Over time, it’s possible that small, yet significant traits and gestures have gotten in the way you positively perceive your partner. It’s essential to put them aside, while focusing on being their number one fan. Don’t be afraid of getting too sentimental with this, but it’s always a great idea to give them gifts from time to time, encourage them verbally and involve yourself in their projects. What’s more, stereotypes tell us that men don’t need so much encouragement, when in fact they need it as much as we do, but are shamed into not openly asking for it.

The little secret behind maintaining a loving and caring relationship throughout the years is actively working on changing faulty patterns and building newer, healthier ones. As long as you and your partner are willing to find ways to bring the spark back, be certain that your efforts won’t be in vain.