There is no doubt that having children has a significant impact on your relationship with your partner. Children are demanding full stop, and life changes the moment that they are born, but add in having to work, running a household and keeping up with friends and family into the mix, your relationship with your partner can suffer.
You both need to work hard to keep your relationship healthy. Here are 3 issues that can affect couples once a baby arrives:
The bane of most homes across the land – household chores. When you have a baby, your attention is diverted to more important matters, but that does not mean that the household chores are magically completed. While you are on maternity leave, you may fall into the position of assuming responsibility for the lion’s share of household chores – this is dangerous territory. Yes, you may be at home most of the day, but during that time you have a baby to look after, and so to avoid too many arguments you need to both agree to split chores before resentment enters your relationship.
Make a daily list of what needs to be done that day so that it is quantifiable rather than being overwhelmed by the extent of what you perceive is needed. You will be able to quickly prioritise the jobs that are essential, and those that can be left. Always thank each other for completing household chores – no one likes doing them and gratitude within a relationship is vital.
You may not feel like you want to have sex as much as you did pre-baby, the appeal of sleep will more than likely be more tempting, but mismatched libidos can cause stress within your relationship. Talk honestly and openly with your partner so that he understands that it is not because you don’t find him attractive, rather you just need time to get back into the swing of things.
Your partner may be experiencing similar feelings of being unattractive and be questioning whether you still feel the same way about him. If this is so, identify how he can boost his confidence: research a hair transplant cost, gym membership cost or even simply plan regular date nights so that confidence can be restored.
Money issues are the source of many challenges that new parents face. You may be unprepared for having to live on a reduced household income, and you may feel overwhelmed at the prospect of having to seriously adjust your lifestyle. You need to review your expenditure to identify where you can save money.
Take control of your finances to alleviate the strain on your budget – check energy providers to make sure that you are getting the best rates, compare car insurance quotes, and buy second-hand clothes for your child – baby clothes are barely worn before the baby has outgrown them and are often as good as new.
Having a baby is life changing; you will be wondering how you filled your time before they came along, but you must invest time in yourself and your relationship so that you can work together, with confidence, to adapt to your new lives.